so my mom got me some "sleeping aids" known as melatonin. i finally got some sleep after FUCKING DAYS of tossing and turning and lying awake, whilst cursing the gods for putting me in through this. the tablet didn't really put to sleep but rather got me to sleep. so unfortunately i still woke up once or twice and had horrible dreams, but HEY. something is better then nothing. i'm still shit tired, but i'm hopeful that i will continue to sleep.

i'm also able to eat a little better. i didn't eat anything yesterday aside from some soup, barely mush, and a fried mushroom until dinner came around. i wasn't hungry, but i knew if i didn't eat i just may passout, so i ordered a bowl of rice porridge. it was my mom's birthday..and i think i was kind of super grumpy due to lack of sleep. feel kind of bad...but anyways. then went to a bbq with friends and had some chips, 2 pickles, and the top half of a burger bun with a slice of cheese. despite the odd combination of foods, i didn't get sick afterwards. THANK GOD FOR THAT. i still don't have an appetite, but at least i can eat if i want to. i've lost 6 pounds in a week. =___=

that aside. i think i'm a bit more stressed out then i realize. WHICH IS TOTALLY GOING AGAINST THE PLAN OF CHILLIN FOR THIS SUMMER WTF. i've been rushing around trying to hang with friends, while college is looming up behind me, responsibilities are catching up, and unexpected relationships are...um....unexpected. i'm particularly nervous about posting certain things on this journal because i'm not exactly sure who reads this. >_> BUT ANYHOS. adios.